This week: when and how to give advice; how people avoid seeing what’s right in front of them; how to avoid getting overwhelmed in life; and what human connection and life are truly all about.
Riffing on Letter 29 from Seneca, this episode is a corker. Advice is a dangerous game: when and how you give it can change your life.
Don’t waste energy and time trying to give advice to those who don’t want to hear it. Not only would Seneca be pissed off at you, you’d be violating the most important of the 48 Laws of Power: Always Say Less Than Necessary.
‘One must not talk to a man unless he is willing to listen’
There’s also a deep arrogance in thinking ‘if only they knew what I knew, they’d choose what I would’. Is that how you feel when someone else sticks their oar in?
Still, keeping an open mind is one of the truest paths to wisdom. So how can we take on advice from other people without getting agitated, angry, or beginning to doubt ourselves? Dre’s got a theory: Treat your mind like you’re the general of an army – there’s competing voices offering you counsel, but you make the decisions. You’re not surrendering your mind or self to someone if you’re willing to hear and perhaps choose to follow their advice, after considering all the options.
We give you some powerful tricks to decode your own emotions – why are you reacting the way you’re reacting? And how can you master the moment before you react and give yourself time to respond instead?
Beyond the back-and-forth of opinions, though, what about real connection? We take a tangent from Seneca’s Letter and dive into something we feel lies at the heart of human existence. Call it vibe, call it harmonisation, call it just plain getting each other. It’s that feeling of deep connection and mutual recognition with other people, and it’s what truly makes us human.
With that connection as our guiding light, advice becomes a whole different game. What if we try not to give out advice, but draw the people we truly value along with us – showing an example, offering an open hand, giving them strength to fail and learn for themselves?
Plus, Dre insists that THERE IS NO TRUTH and tells us he’s planning to make Jon write a new Bible…
- The power of asking for help
- The difference between ‘Help me’ and ‘Save me’
- Beginning working relationships with true personal connections
- Moralising statements are a method of control
- Not casting your pearls before swine
- Doing your best and what that really means
Find Out More:
- Hit us up on our brand new Instagram!
- The full text for free on WikiSource
- Check out the beautiful Human & Alien shirts and caps from Jamie C Johnstone!
- Check out Dre’s appearance on the excellent ‘Adulting with Ebonie’ podcast
- Don Miguel Ruíz’s book, The Four Agreements – highly recommended